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On July 19, 2017, the Air Force posted a request on FedBizOpps, the US government contracting opportunities site, seeking quotes on the cost of acquiring 12 fresh normal human synovial tissue samples. and frozen ribonucleic acid (RNA). . So why do they want Russian DNA?
Samples must be free from sexually transmitted diseases and musculoskeletal injuries. The most interesting part was the requirement that all samples come from Russia and be from the Caucasus – Ukrainian blood, RNA and tissue samples will not be accepted. This has raised some eyebrows in Russia recently.
The Air Force says it’s for trauma research. But Putin’s theory is that the United States is developing a biogenetic weapon that only works on Russians, one weapon would use the unique genetic code of an ethnic Russian to inflict pain and physical damage.
No weapon like this has ever proven it really exists. So what could the Air Force really want?
1. They want to solve the mystery of Anastasia Romanov.
You know what I mean. If you are almost 30, chances are you’ve heard the story of the last “missing” daughter of the Tsar of Russia, Anastasia.
It is a well-known fact that the Czar’s Russian Imperial Family was murdered by Communists, shot, bayoneted and clubbed in a basement somewhere near Yekaterinburg. Somehow, the story goes, the 17-year-old Duchess survived, escaped and fled to America. In the years since, many women have come forward, claiming to be the lost Anastasia Romanov.
It may be time for the Air Force to sort out the mystery once and for all. And maybe find a real claim to the throne. Who loves America.
2. Better digestion.
Have you eaten an MRE lately? Are you still waiting for it to be digested? I ate an MRE Chicken Tetrazzini in 2006 and I’m still mad about it. But do you know who seems to be able to digest anything? Russians. Especially Russian soldiers. Look at what they get in their DFACs.
Yet the Russian military still operates on its galvanized steel belly. Maybe in the basic training they will stop putting salt in the gatorade and switch to good Russian gut bacteria.
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3. To see how well he grows grass.
If you’ve ever spent a day in the U.S. military, you probably know what makes weed grow. Maybe Russian blood can help cabbage grow as well.
4. Everything that is going on here.
Seriously, who is this meme woman? Is she really Russian? And what will the tree trunks be used for? Do we plan to invade Scotland and fight on their terms?
5. Seriously, a biological weapon.
It would help enormously to be able to expel ethnic Russians from Ukraine without killing Ukrainians. Or anyone else for that matter. Imagine a war where only the enemy dies.
Except that the Russian military is as genetically diverse as the US military. Many countries of the former Soviet Union are still very Russian friends and fiercely pro-Russian. Non-Russians have joined its army since the days of the Soviet Union.
6. No, really. Trauma research.
Human synovial tissue is an incredibly specific request, judging by the time I spent doing medical research and then asking my pathologist ex-girlfriend what those big words mean.
Although the Russian demand is difficult to explain, given that you can buy the fabric online now.
But the Air Force said, “The supplier originally provided samples from Russia, suitable for the initial group of diseases, the control group of the samples should also be of Russian origin. The goal is the integrity of the study, not the origin (of the samples). “